Stuggling with the Brick Wall

I try to keep my blog upbeat.  I try to focus on all the things I have to be grateful for in my life.  I try to be positive.  I don't want to drag everyone down by being one of those blogs that's a big ol' whine-fest of things that bother me.  Full of negativity.

But can I be really, really real with y'all for a minute?  Cause, truth is - right now I am struggling a little bit.

I have been working on certain projects in my life. (namely my Etsy shop and my writing)  Things I was sure were part of God's plan for me.  A place where He had brought me.   But recently, I have had new things tossed on to my plate which complicate the process of trying to do what I am doing.  I find myself feeling as if I running into a brick wall over and over again.

photo: publicdomainpictures.net

It seems as though at every turn all I am getting is frustration and disappointments.

This leaves me wondering about the path I am on - which I was sure was God's plan - is right. Are the challenges I am facing the enemy trying to distract me from my goals, or is this God correcting some missteps?

I've prayed about it.  I've cried over it. I have vented to the Man of the House about it.   And (I'm not proud to admit this - it wasn't my finest moment) I've even had some very angry words with God about it. 

And still no answers.  Still I struggle. Still I cry. 

Still I pray.

I haven't given up on my dreams yet.  Although there was one day very recently when I was ready to just pack it up, label it "failed experiment", and move on. Burn my bridges behind me.  But, I didn't.  I couldn't. 

I held on, braced myself, and started forward again.  

It's not easy.

I try to stay focused on the positives.  The silver linings.  The glimmers of hope.

photo: publicdomainpictures.net

Waiting to find the opening in the wall. Or a ladder.

You can find me connecting at these Blog Hops and Link Ups

The Dwelling Tree: Let's Be Friends
Cornerstone Confessions: Titus 2 Tuesday
Rich Faith Rising: Unite!
Growing Home: Growing Homemakers
Yesterfood: Treasure Box Tuesday

Orange Sweater and Hat Set for Baby

https://www.etsy.com/listing/180652991/orange-baby-sweater-hat-gift-set-newborn

 

Sweater and Hat set for newborn to 6 months

$25.00 + shipping

Hand crocheted with soft orange yarn. Plastic pearly buttons on sweater and button accent on hat.

http://www.etsy.com/shop/queenbsbusywork

Coming Soon: Character Cozies

Coming soon to Queen B's Busy Work: 

Mug cozies inspired by popular characters!

Available now through custom order request.

 

 Cozies will sell for $9.95 each, plus $3.00 shipping & handling.  Free shipping with additional items.

Well, Hello there Kitty!

Adventure Time - Jake

Minecraft Creeper

Dr Who - Tardis Inspired Cozy

Love Chevron, Mickey Mouse, or Cabbage Patch Dolls?

New listings at Queen B's Busy Work!

 http://www.etsy.com/shop/QueenBsBusyWork

Cabbage Patch Doll Inspired Wig Hats

Available in child and adult sizes!

Childs ($30.00 + shipping): http://www.etsy.com/listing/178598487/childs-cabbage-patch-doll-inspired-wig?ref=shop_home_active_2

Adults ($38.00 + shipping):  http://www.etsy.com/listing/178587380/adult-cabbage-patch-doll-inspired-wig?ref=shop_home_active_1

Two Happy Customers!  (courtsey: jenanne.com )

 Mickey Mouse Inspired Sleeve/Cozy for To Go Straw Cup

$8.95 + shipping

http://www.etsy.com/listing/178584650/mickey-mouse-inspired-reusable-straw-cup?ref=listing-shop-header-2

Chevron To Go Cup Sleeve/Cozy

Available in a variety of colors

$8.95 + shipping

https://www.etsy.com/listing/178595461/chevron-to-go-cup-sleeve-your-choice-of?ref=shop_home_active_10

 

New Items Now Available!!

These new items are now available at Queen B's Busy Work!

Tiny Crocheted Hearts (set of 6)

Washable Bath/Shower Puff

Valentine's Mug Cozy

Valentine's Heart Hair Clip

 

 

Chunky Blue Cowl

NEW at Queen B's Busy Work!

Chunky Blue Cowl Scarf

 https://www.etsy.com/listing/167367955/chunky-blue-cowl-scarf?ref=shop_home_active

The colors of this yarn brought to mind a clear, cold, winter sky. That's how I knew it had to be crafted into a big warm chunky cowl!

Approximately 11 inches wide.

Handcrafted without following a formal pattern. One of a kind!

Bumble Bee Hat

Now Available at Queen B's Busy Work

BABY/TODDLER BUMBLE BEE HAT

The perfect accessory for your little busy bee!

Available in sizes 0-3 months, 3-6 months, 6-12 months, 12-24 months

$12.00 USD + shipping

https://www.etsy.com/listing/162251753/crocheted-babytoddler-bumble-bee-hat?ref=shop_home_active

10 Piece Cotton Spa Bath Sets

Now available at Queen B's Busy Work:

10 Piece Cotton Spa Bath Sets

 https://www.etsy.com/listing/158515041/10-piece-cotton-spabath-set?ref=shop_home_feat

https://www.etsy.com/listing/158513049/10-piece-cotton-spabath-set?ref=shop_home_feat

 Spa Bath Set hand crocheted from 100% cotton yarn. Makes a lovely gift (or pamper yourself at home!)

 Set Includes:
* 1 Bath Puff
* 1 Washcloth
* 7 Facial Rounds

Handmade from 100% cotton yarn. 

All pieces are machine washable. Drying flat or hanging is recommended to avoid shrinking and changing of shape.

And Now A Word From Our Sponsor...

It's almost flip flop season!!  Are you ready?

 

Queen B's Busy Work is!

http://www.etsy.com/shop/QueenBsBusyWork?ref=si_shop

DID YOU KNOW: Queen B can do custom orders! Looking for a different size or color? Contact shop owner to discuss requests!

Bridal
https://www.etsy.com/listing/101233524/bridal-flip-flops

Polka Dot Bows
https://www.etsy.com/listing/104406973/girly-bow-flip-flops-black-and-white

Fun and Fluffy

http://www.etsy.com/shop/QueenBsBusyWork?section_id=11398345

follow us on Twitter: @QueenBsBusyWork

Pssst... I've Got A Secret!

Here's the scoop... there are three easy steps to extra savings:

1) Follow Queen B's Busy Work on Twitter. @QueenBsBusyWork

2) Tweet about the 10% off CYBERMONDAY coupon code using hash tag #QueenBsBusyWork

3) I'll send you a coupon code for 20% OFF your order at Queen B's!

It's as simple as that! Get buzzing! Offer ends November 30, 2012.

http://www.etsy.com/shop/QueenBsBusyWork?ref=si_shop

Queen B's Holiday Shopping!

It's never too early to start your online holiday shopping! 

Looking for the perfect Christmas present or stocking stuffers? 

Be sure to check out Queen B's Busy Work at Etsy!

New items Coming Soon!!

http://www.etsy.com/shop/QueenBsBusyWork?ref=si_shop

Queen B's Halloween Sale

Queen B's Busy Work is having a HALLOWEEN SALE:

October 26 - November 1 !!

 

Use Coupon Code HALLOWEENQUEEN for 20% Off your order!

http://www.etsy.com/shop/QueenBsBusyWork?ref=si_shop



Trying to Be Creative

I'm trying to be creative.  Feels like my brain is a bit stagnant right now.  Ugh...  Anyway.  While my writing is going no where fast at the moment, I keep plugging along waiting for the inspiration to strike.  And in the quiet time, I am working on some new items for Queen B's Busy Work.

Small Crochet Tote Bag in blue & purple

https://www.etsy.com/listing/106851629/small-crochet-tote-bag-blue-and-purple

Crocheted Baby Pumpkin/Autumn Hat

https://www.etsy.com/listing/107043809/crocheted-baby-pumpkin-autumn-hat-6

Doubt and Anxiety

Doubt and anxiety are eating me alive today.


I thought quitting my paying job was the right decision.  It wasn't a choice I made lightly.  I agonized over it.  I prayed and prayed over it.  I thought that was the right path for the next phase of my life. I would stay home, have my little Etsy shop, take care of my family and manage my home - and all would be right with the world. It all seemed so clear.

Now things are fuzzy.

As we look into the face of expense after unexpected expense my anxiety increases. Queen B's Busy Work isn't buzzing, it's crawling along on it's best days. The items I took to the consignment store still sit on display, unsold. Instead of the bright sunny future I pictured as I made plans, things are looking tight, grim and bleak.

I have a gnawing, nagging, nauseous feeling in my gut. I am doubting myself and the choices I have made in the past year.  I feel guilty for not having a steady income coming in like I used to. I find myself wondering if I should go apply for a part time job - any part time job.  I am beating myself up for leaving my previous job. 

This isn't the way it was supposed to be.

3:30 am

3:30 am.  Wide awake.  Sort of.  Ok, not really.  Sort of half awake.  Not sleepy enough to go back to dreamland.  Not awake enough to get up and do anything productive. 

This seems to be becoming a regular thing for me.  It's not always 3:30.  Sometimes it's 2:30.  Or 4:30.  The exact time isn't really that important.  What ever the time, there I am in the wee hours of the morning.  Awake enough that it does not qualify as rest.  Sleepy enough not to qualify as awake.

The brain churns at 3:30 am.  I feel pretty sure I am at my most creative in those pre-dawn hours.  There in the dark waits ideas for blog posts, writing journal entries, short stories, and perhaps even a first novel.  I'm a literary genius!  It's not just writing either.  The projects for my Etsy shop, home improvement and decorating, even gift ideas.  It all flows like the wine at a bacchanalia. 

Sadly, they never last.  For, at 3:30 in the morning, my mind is still asleep enough that it can't hold onto the brilliance it creates during that time.  Sleep comes, and washes it all away.  The sun rises and my mind strains trying to recapture even one of the ideas it had in the dark.  But they remain elusive, like forgotten dreams.

Maybe This Week

Ok, I admit that most of last weeks goals did not come to completion.  I've moved on, and so should you.  That was last week.  Maybe this week will be different.

Weekly Goals for July 8 - July 13, 2012

• Write everyday.
• Complete Etsy orders and get into mail by Thursday
• Get that mani/pedi that never happened last week
• Clean up kitchen (including cleaning out fridge)

Queen B's Busy Work Summer Giveaway!!

The calendar says summer doesn't start for another week, but it certainly feels like it's already in full swing!  To celebrate  Queen B's Busy Work is giving away a pair of our Fun & Fluffy Flip Flops on my other blog!!

Read More...

http://my-day-job.blogspot.com/2012/06/queen-bs-busy-work-summer-giveaway.html