I don't like the Little Man very much today.
There I said it.
He's surly and irritable.
He talks back. When he talks. Often I'm lucky to get a groan or a growl out of him. Sometimes it's just a scowl.
He leaves a mess behind him where ever he goes. I suppose it's because the mess has gotten too big for his room to contain it any longer.
I'm trying very hard to stay calm and composed. It's getting more and more difficult.
That's right - I'm a Bad Mother.
Call the social workers. Order up some future therapy sessions for him. He drew a bad lot and is stuck with the mom who openly admits that he's not her favorite person today.
I can already imagine all the parenting tips and advice that a post like this could produce as feedback. Save it. I've read the parenting books too. That's not really what I need to hear right now.
Look down your nose at me and shake your head. Judge me. Whatever.
Right now I feel like a miserable failure as a parent on my own. You can either feed that feeling of doubt and frustration, or you can be kind and gentle with me. If you've been a parent for any significant length of time and you are completely honest with yourself - I'm willing to bet that you've had days when you feel like a bad parent too. When you were at your wit's end and didn't know what to do. When you (gasp!) didn't like that offspring of yours very much at the moment. Would you want to be judged at that time? I didn't think so.
Don't get me wrong. I love the kid. I DO! That's not going to change. I just really don't like the way he is acting or his attitude right now.
Tomorrow (or maybe even later today), he'll be back to his smiling, funny self. He may want to sit next to me on the couch and ask me to scratch his back. Everything will be back to normal.
But right now, I'm sending him to his room to do some cleaning. He'll probably pout and mutter something under his breath. He'll stomp off with grumbles of how "it's not fair".
Me? I'm going to put on my Bad Mommy Crown. I've earned it.